Conversations with Batman: On Preschool

In honor of another year of preschool ending, here are a few preschool stories...

October 19, 2011 

Getting ready for preschool today…

Jacob: I’m mad at you, Mama.

Me: Why?

Jacob: I don’t know. I in a grumpy mood.

On the way home from preschool…

Jacob: Jackson took my backpack, and I was like, “I need my backpack right now!” but Miss Melissa gave me my backpack, and she say, “No, that’s Jacob’s backpack.”

September 10, 2012

Jacob is at preschool, which means Drew has free reign over all the toys in the living room. I think it may be the best morning of his life.

October 3, 2012

Jacob: Hello…hello…hello…

Me: Jacob, who are you talking to?

Jacob: I’m just seeing what my voice sounds like. I think it sounds like Ben’s voice. You know, the Ben that sometimes wears the Batman shirt?

Me: Uh huh.

Jacob: That’s what his voice sounds like.

October 17, 2012

Jacob went on a rant today about juice. Gotta love preschool kids’ problems…

Me: What did you have for snack today at preschool?

Jacob: We had animal crackers and apple juice AGAIN! I’m so upset that everyone keeps bringing apple juice. Every kid who hasn’t had a turn yet keeps bringing the same juice that the other kids brought. I just think that’s just stupid.

Me: Maybe they really like apple juice.

Jacob: Well I’m going to tell the kid who brought apple juice today to bring a different juice next time.

John: What do you want to drink with lunch, Jacob? Apple juice?

October 17, 2012

Today Andy asked Jacob if he ever played with one of the girls in his preschool class…

Jacob: No, because she only plays with girl toys.

Me: What are girl toys?

Jacob: Ponies living in houses.

Andy: I thought you liked horses.

Jacob: Not ponies.

Seriously, how do they pick up on this stuff at 3 years old?

November 17, 2012

Jacob: What do these signs say?

Me: They say you have to have a blue tag on your car that matches that sign to park there. Its’ for people who are in wheelchairs or who have a hard time walking very far or maybe have a broken leg…

Jacob: Or maybe if a big animal with sharp teeth ate their legs…

Me: Yep, that too.

February 18, 2013
Me: Did you know you don't have preschool today?
Jacob: Why not?
Me: Because it's President's Day. It's a holiday.
Jacob: Yay! Does that mean I can open my birthday presents?
Nice try.

March 27, 2013
Jacob's friend Jack at preschool invited him to a birthday party at his house. After Jacob got the invitation, he asked Andy and me,"Do you think Jack thinks I know how to drive?"

Being a sidekick mom

"If you want to call me a name, call me Bruce. If you don't like Bruce, you can call me Batman."

Jacob says this to me or Andy on a regular basis. In fact, we all have alter egos in our household, and sometimes alter egos for our alter egos.

Andy is Super Hero, which, in case you didn't know, is Superman's nickname. Drew is Baby Bat. Rocket used to be the Joker (every time he barked he was laughing maniacally), but I guess he left his evil ways, because now he is Green Arrow Dog. Uncle John, our former housemate, is Green Arrow. Because that's not confusing at all. And as for me, I am Robin. 

I haven't always been Robin. For awhile I was Alfred, which I kind of liked. It meant I was the older and wiser one. A good identity for a parent. For a brief and beautiful period of time, I got to be Catwoman. A female character! Not Thomas the Tank Engine, not Donatello the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle, not Dr. Sharp Tooth the T-Rex, but Catwoman! Hurray!

Well, it wasn't meant to last. For quite some time now, I've been Robin. The sidekick. I guess it makes sense, because Jacob is 4, so the world revolves around him, right? And truthfully, I will be following Jacob around on his adventures for a long time as he grows up. Real-life ones like school and sports and music -- or whatever he gets involved in as he gets older -- and make-believe ones (not necessarily a distinction he makes in his mind, but you get the point). 

And soon my other little super hero will have a mind of his own and adventures of his own. Well, okay, Baby Bat already has a mind of his own. He's just not really expressing it in words yet. His language is more like... climbing on things. But he might be Batman too some day (can we have two in one house? will the world implode?). Or maybe Thor. Or Iron Man. I'm kind of rooting for Iron Man. (Please, God, not the Hulk. Please no mega-tantrums justified by creative license.) 

At any rate, I don't expect to lose my sidekick status any time soon. So I've embraced it. I'm living with super heroes. I'm the sidekick. And this blog tells our stories.